Tag Archives: Five Mile Run

German Expressionist Theatre Presents: A 5.54 Mile Run in Savage Humidity: Botendaddy on Trial for {CENSORED}

[Opens to a stage in a smoke-filled Deutsche film-noir 1920’s style theater.] NARRATOR: [In Weimar-Era top hat and tails] ‘Obviously in every German Expressionist play is the existential-oppositional-nihilist anarchist-deontological-neo-structuralism between Totalitarian Fascism and Extreme Socialism presented in incomprehensible 1920’s dialectic.’ … Continue reading

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Botendaddy Runs with the Aliens

“Whassupp B-word! Yo yo yo it’s me Gryzwaczasdfg in the hizzouse! This my boy Gryzwaczqwerty we gonna be running with you today. You know what I’m saying?” The two Boleans with blue glowing eyes sort of stood out in the sub-rural … Continue reading

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Alt-Right and Batboy Attack Pinko Botendaddy for Qweeting about Yvanka’s Appearance at the 5 Mile Run

DATELINE: WASHINGTON (1940’s TYPING SOUND EFFECT) Botendaddy Qweet picked up on the wire. It was a Hells-Vargo Cable-Telegram-Telegraph-Marconi-Wireless Qweet. “Suddenly today, Botendaddy issued a Qweet that said the following: Qweet! Botendaddy March 12, 2017 17:30 Yvanka showed up at my … Continue reading

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Flair up Fatty! The Voat Fat People Hate Verified Shit Lady Hunts The Mothman

“So you are running tomorrow? In some 5 miler? How do you run in this cold, you bloated Crisco-Demon. You Heffalump deathfat. This museum is awesome. The Mothman is swole. I heard you got schooled on FPH. You insulted cosplay! … Continue reading

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Botendaddy named ‘Sexiest Man Alive’ again, ‘Batboy’ and ‘The Rock’ Stunned

I was at the indoor track. It was seven degrees outside. I’ve run in colder, I just didn’t want to. I went up to the track where a stream of middle school aged kids kept walking in groups on lane … Continue reading

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An Indoor Five Mile Run with the Voat Fat People Hate Verified Sh!tlady

I was all alone in the basement locker room of the old Field House. Finally solitude. I changed into indoor running gear. I would have the darkened track to myself. I emerged completely unclothed from the shower and there she … Continue reading

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Michigan Called for Trump by the Alt-Right Librarian and a Five-Mile Trail Run

Another Five mile trail run. I was joined by the librarian. “I can’t believe you didn’t vote. I can’t believe it’s almost 60 degrees and I can’t believe that you can run in that enormous, tasty adult diaper.” 9:01 first mile. … Continue reading

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