I went back to Hollywood to pitch a new series to Schlomo Boingboomtschak and his sidekick Schmuel Cohensteinboim of Werenottoojewish Studios.
“Cchello my Boychik Botendaddy. You look about as Jewish as Olaf Olaussen. What are you like 1/16th Zschiewisch (pronounced Jewish)? come have Kreplach soup 🍜 and nice 👍 knish and pitch me your latest. Your last idea? Teenage Hitler? They’ve picked up 12 more episodes, these kids today, they just love ❤️ Hitler!”
“Ok, here’s the pitch, Schreechiamous Bang, cousin of Bang 💥 Olaussen is the shittiest driver on earth 🌏. It’s like a zany new Mr. Magoo, but less racist. You see Charlie, the Chinese San Francisco sidekick is a hot as balls 🏀 female grad 👩🎓 student who makes big bucks working for the wealthy eccentric professor 👨🏫 of mechanical engineering and auto design. She has to drive for him or he’ll kill somebody, he’s always running over chickens, crashing into carts 🛒 of watermelon 🍉 destroying fake 🐑 ramshackle market places. You see, it’s onomatopoeia: like a car 🚗 crash sound 🔊 screech-bang!”
“It’s great 👍 my Boychik. We get a hot Chinese broad, named Charlie, but Zaftig, and a master of Gong Fu, with yuge jugs and a big tushie and even though she’s only 24, she’s secretly in love with professor 👨🏫 Bang because he’s rich, eccentric and fun and he takes her all around the world, but he’s too much of a mad scientist 👩🔬 to realize that she’s in love 😍 with him.” Said Schlomo.
“Right, so every week they have madcap zany adventures, he wrecks the same beat up 🤕 car and she’s got to keep him out of the wacky troubles he gets in.” I said.
“Yes and she’s always flirting with him, and he loves her in his own weird way but doesn’t realize that she’s romantic for him.”
“I love it! 6 episodes to start.”
Peace be the Botendaddy