A quick, sickly 3-1/3 mile run: Botendaddy Readers Voted Sexiest Readers in the World by Five International Surveys

I wasn’t feeling it. I was recovering from some sort of Flu. My weight was down to 195.6 for a BMI of 23.8 waist 33.0″ height 6’4″ bodyfat 13%.

The first mile was OK, but I felt my knee almost pop so I had Sloan down a bit when I was joined by the Weird Foreign Doctor Chick.

“So you don’t look well. And you are wearing an enormous, del.ic.io.us adult diaper. But you do not smell like the anus of the village mountain goat thank the divine great hawk!”

image

The country lane

“Are you weird even for your own country WFDC?”

“My village, I was the smartest person. They all mocked me and hated me. Life at 18,000 feet is not easy, let me to have been telling you, Helping Whitey carry packs up the mountain past all the dead bodies of climbers got pretty dull after a fashion. Mr. white Caucasian, Pale Face, Mr Charlie, Bobo, Ofay, Devil, Gweilo, Laa Shems, Anglo-Saxon, inexplicably fair-haired green-eyed Jewish-person. No one believes you are Jewish by the way. They all think it is to have been being some sort of schtick to look anti-cool.”

9:34 mile awful. We ran through nice sub-rural neighborhoods.

“You have contaminated my little brown body with your filthy colonial red hot devil spermatozoa. Ah the taste of it. I feel so dirty! You must sully me again oh great white grizzled Yankee devil-person. Most men won’t talk to me. My father and brothers think I am insane. You don’t think I’m insane do you?”

Two miles – 20:30 atrocious. My stomach was in knots.

“You’re as normal as any of the others in the Writer’s Workshop but you write much better than you speak.”

“It’s called British Public School in a Commonwealth Country you great white Equinsu Ocha. Or Ochocinco or whatever. We DO speak English in What.”

Three miles 33 something. I was barely hanging on.

“I am going to quit at three and a third. You run OK you know that WFDC?”

“Well I’m only 27 and I carried packs up to 29,002 feet most of my life. Can I show you my t1t5?”

“Jeez! Were in a parking lot! Put your little brown t1tt!35 away for f@&k’s sake. Are you r3t4rd3d?”

I shouted at her.

“Let’s go to your hot tub and f&$k. You owe me. It’s white colonial guilt.” She responded dryly.

“Hazelnut Mocha?”

Peace be the Botendaddy

 

 

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About Botendaddy

Three times voted extreme sexiest man alive...by acclamation. I run because I must...I must!
This entry was posted in Critic's Corner, Dining, Exercise, Fashion, Food, People, Running, Technology, Weather and tagged , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

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