Things I Hate

If you like any of these things, too bad. It won’t make me un-hate them. These are some of my hates.

  1. I hate traffic lights.
  2. I hate when I search for ‘Botendaddy’ in Google and it comes up with the shitty website ‘Bootdaddy’… clue: WTF is Bootdaddy? I never want to see it come up again… ever. I AM THE BOTENDADDY! F&$K BOOTDADDY!
  3. I hate the metric system
  4. I hate anime
  5. I hate cosplay
  6. I hate the New England Patriots
  7. I hate ‘Yaz’ and the shitty Red Sox
  8. I hate musicals
  9. I hate opera
  10. I hate listening
  11. I hate waiting
  12. I hate Harry Potter
  13. I Hate Star Wars, except Jabba the Hut
  14. I hate yams, Brussels sprouts and liver
  15. I hate Steven King
  16. I hate Lord of the Flies
  17. I hate furries
  18. I hate Fleetwood Mac
  19. I hate ‘Martin’
  20. I hate Seinfeld
  21. I hate Lucille Ball
  22. I hate Milton Berle
  23. I hate Abba
  24. I hate Penn State
  25. I hate the Catskills
  26. I hate Oprah
  27. I hate Catcher in the Rye
  28. I hate To Kill a Mockingbird
  29. I hate Billy Joel
  30. I hate Jay-Z and Beyoncé
  31. I hate trying to stay awake
  32. I hate mornings
  33. I hate summer
  34. I hate Florida
  35. I hate Texas
  36. I hate hot weather
  37. I hate sunshine
  38. I hate the NBA
  39. I hate fantasy sports
  40. I hate Vegas
  41. I hate The Godfather
  42. I hate The Stand and The Shawshank Redemption
  43. I hate the Brady Bunch TV Series
  44. I hate pretending that ugly babies aren’t ugly
  45. I hate saying good morning to people
  46. I hate shaking hands
  47. I hate Whitney
  48. I hate not eating
  49. I hate Zippy the Pinhead
  50. I hate Family Circus
  51. I hate People who say ‘No-one cares what you think’ they can bugger right off.
  52. I hate Broadway Musicals.
  53. I hate being bored
  54. I hate flying
  55. I hate running
  56. I hate paying attention
  57. I hate people who ask if I’m listening or paying attention, clue: I’m not.
  58. I hate people who force eye contact
  59. I hate being interrogated, clue: f@&k you, that’s my answer
  60. I hate being corrected
  61. I hate McDonald’s coffee
  62. I hate vomit and I hate people who vomit
  63. I hate people who don’t wash their hands after their shitty urinating
  64. I hate loud people, clue: shut the f&$k up, you shitty moron.
  65. I hate Jackie Chan
  66. I hate Facebook
  67. I hate Megabus
  68. I hate Thanksgiving Dinner
  69. I hate making small talk when I’m a stranger
  70. I hate people who turn left and block traffic
  71. I hate Romantic Comedy
  72. I hate reality television
  73. I hate Julia Roberts
  74. I hate the movie Pretty Woman
  75. I hate Bridget Jones
  76. I hate graphic novels
  77. I hate when men are called sluts, clue: its stupid
  78. I hate pronouncing things the way other people want me to
  79. I hate when people force rhymes
  80. I hate your Pit
  81. I hate Chihuahuas
  82. I hate mean stupid ugly one-eyed hissing cats
  83. I hate Last Christmas
  84. I hate George Michael
  85. I hate Carrie Fisher
  86. I hate Laverne and Shirley
  87. I hate Lenny and Squiggy
  88. I hate when people tell me something that’s obviously false
  89. I hate rude people
  90. I hate Amy Schumer
  91. I hate Lena Dunham
  92. I hate when people think I know who someone is when I’ve never heard of them
  93. I hate when people don’t make my coffee right
  94. I hate long guitar solos
  95. I hate politics
  96. I hate following the rules
  97. I hate reading instructions
  98. I hate rabbits
  99. I hate people who let their dogs run off leash on a jogging path
  100. I hate shrieky warbling music
  101. I hate Adele
  102. I hate commercials
  103. I hate previews
  104. I hate moths
  105. I hate stink bugs
  106. I hate LARP
  107. I hate having to pretend to agree with people
  108. I hate no WiFi
  109. I hate low Battery
  110. I hate no wall outlets in coffee shops and libraries, it’s 2017 for Khufu’s sake
  111. I hate when you enter a search that Google doesn’t like and they change what you’re looking for, like if I enter ‘Google sucks’ I don’t want results that talk about how great Google is, clue: it’s pathetic, just be honest if you suck goat anus
  112. I hate Yahoo
  113. I hate Marissa Mayer
  114. I hate Zuckerberg
  115. I hate Carly Fiorina
  116. I hate politicians of any party
  117. I hate people who like politics
  118. I hate Pony Play
  119. I hate strippers
  120. I hate autocorrect when I speak and write better than than the idiot fart-eater who programmed it
  121. I hate when people force sympathy
  122. I hate active voice
  123. I hate ‘a, b, and c’ it’s fu&$ing stupid, clue: it’s ‘a, b and c’ you shit-head fu&$k-face douchebag, illiterate, stupid, moron, f&$k your phony rules of grammar you cretin: clue: THE COMMA MEANS ‘AND’ ALREADY, YOU ASS
  124. I hate not ending a sentence with a preposition when it’s a Germanic root split verb
  125. I hate taking out garbage
  126. I hate separating garbage
  127. I hate People who sit in the bathroom too long
  128. I hate Having to download your shitty app
  129. I hate creating a user to read a news story
  130. I hate paywalls from shitty news sites like the Post-Gazette
  131. I hate Little boys with long hair
  132. I hate Jokes that are too long
  133. I hate People who write checks in the grocery
  134. I hate People who order complicated omlettes in the Army Chow line
  135. I hate boxer shorts
  136. I hate Shit covered shrieking children
  137. I hate People with stupid food allergies
  138. I hate liars who eat gluten-free when like nobody has Celiac’s disease
  139. I hate whiny sleep apnea people
  140. I hate people who hate other people but whine when people hate them back
  141. I hate people who hate the Steelers
  142. I hate people who hate Sidney Crosby
  143. I hate people who hate ‘He hate me’
  144. I hate people who hate Ochocinco
  145. I hate shitty Islanders fans
  146. I hate Long Island, clue: Otsego County rocks, you suck
  147. I hate the closing of Carnegie Deli
  148. I hate the new Darren Stevens
  149. I hate E.T.
  150. I hate Richard Dreyfus
  151. I hate Canton, Ohio, clue: it’s a long story
  152. I hate Eddie Izzard
  153. I hate partial transvestites
  154. I hate Rosanne Barr and Tom Arnold
  155. I hate Renee Zellweger
  156. I hate People who complain about being interrupted, clue: Shut up
  157. I hate any form of pop-up
  158. I hate ads telling me I just won an IPhone
  159. I hate Vegans
  160. I hate Priuses
  161. I hate Lexuses
  162. I hate United Airlines
  163. I hate Sbarro’s
  164. I hate Shrek
  165. I hate Fiona
  166. I also hate Fiona on ‘Shameless’
  167. I hate the Hawaiian version of ‘Somewhere Over the Rainbow’
  168. I hate the song ‘Hallelujah’ it’s boring, lame and it sucks
  169. I hate Leonard Cohen
  170. I hate Streissand
  171. I hate ‘Yentl’
  172. I hate Betty Friedan
  173. I hate ‘Portnoy’s Complaint’
  174. I hate the old song’Summertime’
  175. I hate Liza Minnelli
  176. I hate ‘True Blood’
  177. I hate Vampires, except Vlad
  178. I hate Twilight
  179. I hate Kristin Stewart
  180. I hate LeBron
  181. I hate Kapernick
  182. I hate ‘The West Wing’
  183. I hate ‘Madame Secretary’
  184. I hate ‘In the Heat of the Night’
  185. I hate Aaron Sorkin
  186. I hate Arianna Grande
  187. I hate Taylor Swift
  188. I hate Mason Reese
  189. I hate Iggy Azaela
  190. I hate Lady Gaga
  191. I hate Madonna
  192. I hate the SCA
  193. I hate chopped liver
  194. I hate Kugel
  195. I hate Angelina Jolie
  196. I hate being called out
  197. I hate waiting for updates
  198. I hate being confronted, clue: f&$k you
  199. I hate that we only have eight planets, clue Pluto is a goddamned planet, f&$k-face
  200. I hate People who urinate on toilet seats
  201. I hate people who clog toilets, with their shitty crève.
  202. I hate logic problems
  203. I hate sequels
  204. I hate people who claim to be ´victims’
  205. I hate People who say ‘remember when we agreed that you would…’, clue: f@&k you you goat-faced baboon f&$ker, I didn’t sign a contract in blood, so f@&k you
  206. I hate Norwegian troll dolls
  207. I hate Mahler
  208. I hate People who like Mahler
  209. I hate ‘Das Himmlische Leben’
  210. I hate the Olsen Twins
  211. I hate male names for hurricanes
  212. I hate Ellen
  213. I hate people who expect me to remember a conversation from three months ago
  214. I hate People who pop their gum, clue: die in extreme pain
  215. I hate Rod Stewart
  216. I hate ‘Maggie Mae’
  217. I hate ‘Bobby McGee’
  218. I hate Janis
  219. I hate the Bay City Rollers
  220. I hate Disney
  221. I hate addicts who don’t go to NA
  222. I hate alcoholics who don’t go to AA
  223. I hate psychos who don’t take their Meds
  224. I hate Lima Beans except when they are in soup
  225. I hate JLo
  226. I hate Madonna
  227. I hate Sean Reynard and the stupid Royals storyline on Grimm
  228. I hate when a show kills off the main character
  229. I hate ‘Black Sails’
  230. I hate Woody Allen
  231. I hate when young people walk directly into me
  232. I hate getting haircuts
  233. I hate when people say ‘we’re’ pregnant’. clue: ‘Do I say ‘our shit-covered balls itch’? No, I don’t. because you don’t have balls and men don’t have a uterus.
  234. I hate ‘Ted Talks’, a lot

‘Mocha?’

Peace be the Botendaddy

 

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About Botendaddy

Three times voted extreme sexiest man alive...by acclamation. I run because I must...I must!
This entry was posted in Critic's Corner, Uncategorized and tagged , . Bookmark the permalink.

2 Responses to Things I Hate

  1. Poor metric system. Now I am waiting for a list of things you love 🤗

    Like

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