Raise the Roof 5k – Kittanning, PA

It was a long drive to get there.

Most of the people were local and many seemed to know each other. I try not to force conversations with strangers as they usually hate that. I did talk to couple of people after the race. Just regular folks. I find if you are a stranger especially in the small local races, it’s best to be a bit of a fly on the wall. By the way I hate these nasty synthetic shirts they give away now. I love cotton, I hate synthetics. I hated that miserable UnderArmour ™®© crap, it feels nasty. I refused to wear it in Iraq, I just stuck to cotton…BECAUSE IT BREATHES! WHO CARES IF IT GETS SOAKED WITH SWEAT! IT’S BETTER THAN CHOKING IN STINKING PLASTIC FABRIC! And what happens if you hit an IED or something, then you have plastic burned into your flesh…nice.

We mostly ran through an arcade of trees. No-one’s position really changed after the first quarter mile. My first mile was atrocious. I couldn’t really breathe. Maybe the Mocha and aspirin had the wrong effect. They did have equally spaced water stations thank the divine Khufu. My MapMyRun app always screws up the first mile by GPS and when I hit the first mile it said 0.82 which is about standard for some reason.

69 degrees at race time. Flat course, lots of shade. Fastest 5k of the year. 38:57. I passed an 80 year old man, a fat guy and three little kids in the last mile. Then I sprinted over the last quarter mile. I don’t remember the last time that I could do that. I saw the time ticking towards 39:00, the crowd was inspired by my late charge, much like the charge of a savage stinky, reeking, hairy, muscular, shrieking Woolly Mastodon.

Eat my dust suckaaaz! They did have donuts at the end of the race thank Lord Sneferu.

This race is highly recommended due to the flat course and scenic riverside vistas.



About Botendaddy

Three times voted extreme sexiest man alive...by acclamation. I run because I must...I must!
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