“Botendaddy, allow me to speak.” Said the VFPHVSL.
- Backboobs, Backcleavage, Beetus,
- Beetus-Juice, CI-CO, Condishuns,
- FA, Fathate, Fatlogic,
- Fattit, Feddit, HAES
- Hamdelusional, Hamgur, McBeetus,
- Obesity Paradox, Reee! Reee!, Scooty-puff,
- Shitlady, Shitlord, Shitlording,
- SJW, Thermodynamics, Triggered,
- Tubblr, Whalemart, Beetus-eater,
- Beluga, Blackholeham, Butterbeast,
- Buttergolem, Butter Huffer, Butterham,
- Chairbreaker, Caloriedumpster, Co-Porker,
- Criscodemon, Deathfat, Eatbeast,
- Fatty, Fatass, Fupacabra,
- Eye-pollution, Fat-to-thin, Fatty,
- Femayo, Former-fat, Former-humans,
- Fupa Trupa, Greasehog,
- Greasegoblin, Ham, Hambeast,
- Hamily, Hamlord, Hamplanet,
- Hamsteroid, Eyebleach, Heffalump,
- Hogbeast, Landwalrus, Landwhale,
- Lard of the Chins, Lardass, Lardbeast,
- Lardbucket, Lardbutter, Lardcave,
- Lardvaark, Mayotanker, Mayogender,
- Minimoon, Obeast, Pigf*cker,
- Pooldefecator, Planet, Porker,
- Skinnyfat, Smallfat, Thin-to-fat,
- Tub of lard, Tumblerina!…
HAAAAAAAAATE! DIE DIE DIE! YOU SHIT-COVERED LAND-WALRUS! MAY LORD BRIMLEY TAKE THY ROTTING BODYPARTS FOR HIS SACRIFICE!!!”
Now I feel much better. It’s out of my system.” The VFPHVSL was exhausted, leaning with her hands on her knees.
We were joined by the equally psychotic No-one Cares Lady.
“No-one cares about your stupid Voat Fat-Hate You F*%KING IDIOT! SHUT THE F*&K UP!…
No-one cares about Botendaddy’s death-reeking del.ic.io.us adult diaper.. aah the smell of it! Let’s run, you f&%king morons!”
“By the way, I love our readers, we almost have 5,000 hits! We even got a hit from Russia! It’s awesome! Our readers are the *hottest!*!” I said as we began to run.
I had nothing. We ran up a steep mountain ridge across the country line. We got lost but miraculously found a road that lead back to the start… 2.75 miles from the start, but what are you gonna do.
“You are running like shit today, Botendaddy. Fat affecting your ability to run? Overheating from the steaming, post-apocalyptic diaper?” Asked the VFPHVSL.
“No-one cares about your over-heating.” Said the NCL.
The two girls fought and sniped at each other the entire run. They were right in front of me so I could stare at their lithe, bouncing female buttockses the entire time. It was mesmerizing.
“Are you looking at my ass?” Asked the VFPHVSL?
“Yeah, No-one cares about your sick old man perversions. You wish, you rotting aged freak.” Said the NCL
“What… were you two mouthy broads saying something while I was staring at your sweaty-wet, *hot*, supple, girlie ass-cracques? I didn’t hear a single word either of you said. Why? BECAUSE I’M NOT F&%KING BLIND! I am staring at your asses! Are you f%$king kidding me? COVFEFE! COVFEFE! OH LORDY, LORDY JIM IS FORTY! I WANT TO COVFEFE BOTH OF YOU IN YOUR SWEATY COVFEFES! I HOPE I DIE F&%KING THE BOTH OF YOU! WHAT THE HELL DO YOU THINK I’M LOOKING AT? I’M NOT DEAD!… YET…”
The girls then picked up the pace and disappeared over the horizon.
So, I wouldn’t get any COVFEFE today, but I was finally, blissfully alone.
I staggered into the parking lot.
I went into the darkened condo.
I climbed into the hot-tub, but unfortunately they were both there waiting for me.
“Mocha Java with Nutmeg?”
Peace be the Botendaddy